Last Sunday’s 60 Minutes segment, Tucson: Descent Into Madness, on the recent shooting in Arizona airs an interview from two friends of Jared Loughner.
Their observations offer deeper insight into Jared Loughner. Excerpts from their main recollections are at the end of this post.
What caught my attention was when they said how “Jared literally believes in nothing, nothingness”, and that “He was obsessed with how words were meaningless”. That comes awfully close to how I’d describe a Taoist. Indeed, that describes me, albeit without that worrisome “literally believes in nothing” and “obsessed with how words were meaningless”. It sounds like he didn’t have anything to counterbalance his emptiness. This reminds me of chapter 72’s, When the people lack a proper sense of awe, then some awful visitation will descend upon them. Somehow, Jared’s mind slipped into ‘taoist- like’ perceptions that his emotions were incapable of dealing with. Clearly, an immature soul that stumbles into the ‘tao’ can create considerable destructive forces.
Finding life meaning when the conventional forms of meaning begin to wither away requires, I found, three treasures mentioned in chapter 67, The first is known as compassion, The second is known as frugality, The third is known as not daring to take the lead in the empire. These anchor intention and counterbalance one’s loss of faith in civilization’s often-arbitrary ethics.
We only cling to things and ideas because we need to, at least from a symptoms point of view. Nothing can be worse than having this need without enough faith in that to which we cling. “Believing in nothingness” is the worst of both worlds, and would drive any mind mad I imagine.
By the way, years ago I worried for a while whether ‘sharing’ my unorthodox views might really disturb some people’s mind. I was relieved to find I actually never changed anyone’s mind, at least for more than a moment. We hold on to our worldview most tenaciously — for dear life really! Yet, Jared shows why I was concerned. I can only feel that Jared held no stable worldview to help keep him grounded. Why? I assume his extremely unbalanced emotions couldn’t manage a coherent worldview.
I now realize that anyone who understands what I’m saying already knows, at least intuitively, what I’m driving at. In other words, we only truly understand what we already know. (See also You Know, Learning What You Know, and I understand, but do I know?)
Chapter 71’s warning, Not to know yet to think that one knows will lead to difficulty applies to our species because we merely shape our understanding to match our current visceral reality — intuitive knowing. A contemporary example of this is the Islamic terrorist killing in the name of Allah. They are Muslim in name only. Their ‘visceral knowing’ is a desperate, disconnected, hell from which arises their shallow tribal brutal understanding of Islam. Jarad was a kind of ‘taoist’ in name only.
From the 60 Minutes interview with Jared’s friends.
“I was afraid I was going to wake up and find and see his name in an obituary in a couple of days,” Bryce Tierney, a close friend Jared Loughner, told Pelley (the 60 Minutes’ interviewer).
“Up until he was about 19 or 20 he was always, you know, pretty enthusiastic, pretty passionate. He was always quiet but you could see that there was that passion in him. He did care, he was happy. He was always an observer and especially around the time he started getting mentally ill.”
Tierney and Conway say that’s because their friend was slipping into insanity and it was showing up in the poetry he wrote. “I started seeing heavy influence of just chaos and just non-connective patterning in his, in his poetry. Just ranting or mixing of ideas,” Conway explained.
“Did you ask him what he was driving at, what he was thinking?” Pelley asked. “Oh, yeah,” Conway replied. “And I told him, I was like, ‘Like, because I read it and I just don’t find, I find nothing. It’s like nothingness to me and he was like, ‘Exactly!’ You know, that’s where the meaning is. “People are gonna say he doesn’t believe in anything but it’s not that he doesn’t believe in anything he literally believes in nothing, nothingness.”
Tierney and Conway told “60 Minutes” Loughner was interested in a philosophy called nihilism; it essentially says life is meaningless. They say he was obsessed with the film “Waking Life” in which a man walks through his dreams listening to various philosophies.
A character in the film echoes something at the center of Loughner’s apparent delusions: that big government and media conspire to silence the average guy. To protest his lack of voice, the character in the film sets himself on fire.
Loughner told his friends reality has no more substance than dreams. “He was obsessed with how words were meaningless, you know, you could say ‘This is a cup.’ And he’d be like, ‘Is it a cup or is it a pool? Is it a shark? Is it, you know, an airplane?’ You know?” Conway said.
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Good, now I see more what you meant. I’m afraid I no longer even think of these matters in terms this or that “tradition”. I reckon each person’s understanding of what ‘is’ reflects the needs and fears of their own era. Of course that applies to me also. This makes the taoist point of view the only stop-over on the the way to silence.
Thanks for the welcome!
I agree with you, though I think this is more a “Taoist/Zennist” view than what the traditional Theravadan Buddhists would posit (a peruse through the Dhammapada and some of the Middle Discourses would support their take).
I guess I’m saying that according to more traditional and early Buddhist thought I don’t agree it is either/or in the sense of either staying in delusion and living the life of a house-holder without a chance of liberation in this life… or taking up a life of a monk and working through the four stages of enlightenment. I don’t think this accords with what is ‘natural’ as is found in philosophical Taoist thought.
Welcome Jamie G.
Whether one agrees with Buddha, or anything for that matter, depends on the eye of the beholder. I’ve found what we see is more a reflection of who we are as beholders, than of the the thing beheld.
My sense of Buddha’s truth of suffering is that peace of mind/emotion come through accepting that pleasure (gain/attachment) and pain (loss) produce each other. My sanity rests on that simple sense of balance. A sense that is all to easily drown out by the scurry forward.
It seems to be a tough transition from realism to idealism, realizing that life very well may just be a dream of a butterfly. But so what? I don’t think that I would have made the same choice as Neo in the “Matrix”. Red pill/blue pill… why either/or?
This is part of the reason I left my Zen practice and felt more comfortable with ‘philosophical’ Taoism (though I’m done labeling myself, I wouldn’t call myself a Taoist, per se). I DON’T agree with the Buddha in the sense that, though my suffering may be caused by attachment, I’m perfectly fine with suffering and delusion as far as enjoying my daughter, my wife, a sunrise, the feeling after a good run, life in general… and knowing I will eventually lose them all.
I disagree with Dogen Zenji’s “practice is enlightenment”, and find more home with Rinzai and the “crazy masters” like Bankei and Bassui (noticing the strong influence of Taoism and the naturalness of “just living”).
Anyways… I find the whole argument of “reality” a sometimes fun play in language and existentialism, but in keeping with Lao-Tzu… moderation is key, the real fun comes in just enjoying life here and now as it is… death will come eventually, and we can worry about the rest of the other stuff then.
I think the most important part of the observations that life is meaningless, dwelling on nothingness, is remembering that they are observations. Life (reality) just is. What we think and feel about it is our perspective. The more I can remember that, the more I can turn back to “the big picture”, and not just stay glued to my perspective, as if that’s all there is. Being as mindful of the moment as I can helps to ease up on the sharpness of my emotional judgement.
“Dividing lines” are really in the eye of the beholder. The fuzzier the dividing lines appear, the more we are glimpsing the big picture forest rather than the agenda of our narrow interests (desires).
Not if you’re hungry! Then the mind relinquishes ‘control’ back to biology.
Not so in my view. Anyone with murderous or suicidal intentions (unbalanced) is incapable of seeing through taoist’s eyes. Although, they might think they understand.
Years ago I worried whether sharing my ‘taoist’ point of view might mess up someone’s mind. I was relieved to find I actually never changed anyone’s mind (for more than a moment anyway). We hold our world-views most tenaciously! Although, Jared shows why I was concerned. Fortunately everything happens to us naturally, whether or not to our liking.
I now realize that anyone who understands what I’m saying already knows, at least intuitively, what I’m driving at. In other words, we only truly understands what we already know. Understanding vs. Knowing speaks to this somewhat. Those who do not know yet think that they know, are simply shaping their understanding to match their current gut knowing (feeling). An example of this are the Islamic terrorist killing in the name of Allah (same goes for Christians, Jews, Buddhist (etc.) who are such in name only). Jarad was a kind of ‘taoist’ in name only.
That’s why I say, hunger gives you something real to worry about. This is also why those well fed are more apt to be neurotic. Christ spoke to this when he said, “It is easy for a It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of God”.
So… as a relatively new Taoist, I’m not finding a very bold dividing line between Taoism and nihilism. I mean, life is meaningless, essentially. In fact, I’d go a bit further, and say he’s just interpreting the selfsame ideas slightly differently.
Which actually leads me onto something I’ve been thinking recently. The ideas embodied in Taoist thought clearly have the potential to lead one in the direction of homicidal or suicidal ideas. For my part, I’ve found that if I’m able to really detach myself from my worries (the ease of which differs depending on the worries), I start to feel desperately bored, which leads into a profound depression. Without anything to worry about, I quickly find I lose interest in everything. I’m not in the slightest bit surprised to find someone with similar ideas has killed a bunch of people. I find myself wondering if there are many people who, after embracing Taoism, have found it too much of an adjustment and killed themselves (despite the notion that “there is a regular executioner whose charge it is to kill”).
Any thoughts? I’m sure the fact that I harbour these thoughts means I have more to learn about the practice of Taoism. That’s what I’m here for, I guess.