Turning back is how the way moves;
Weakness is the means the way employs.
When everything feels right with the world, I relax and easily do nothing. I only spring into action when I start to feel that balance slipping away. Weakness is the means the way employs reminds me of the sense of falling behind. Insecurity is the engine that drives life. Thus, all that I do in life really arises from weakness, and reflects my efforts to compensate for such.
A major illusion in life is the sense that through action, success and moving forward I can avoid my deep inner sense of weakness. It took years to realize that, alas, the weakness is always there. When I turn back into the weakness and accept that I have to deal with it no matter what, I waste less energy rushing forward. Attempting to escape weakness creates all sorts of unintended consequences, which add to my woe.
Instead of trying to resolve a present dilemma by looking to the future, I attempt to see the present as the ‘future of my past’. By turning back in this way, I feel more connected with how the way moves. I also get a deeper sense of the future consequences of the present, which makes me more careful. Tentative, as if fording a river in winter, Hesitant, as if in fear of his neighbors [see ch. 15].
One problem with civilization is that it removes weakness from many aspects of daily life. This frees us to live though our minds in more of a virtual existence. We strive to liberate ourselves from nature’s ruthless way and the means this way employs, but end up with unintended consequences.
Turning back is the only way I’m able to appreciate anything. It’s difficult for I’m always pushed to look forward. This is an ironic tragedy of desire—I desire what I don’t have; when I get it, up springs another desire, and on I go. By not turning back, I can’t savor the present moment, where in lies the fruition of all past desire.
Turning back and facing weakness and accepting that it is actually the only reality—that all attempts to escape are futile—is very liberating. Peace comes, and I’m better able to just do what I need to do without a lot of energy wasted on futile illusions. When I don’t face weakness, I react to it and get fooled into believing action will overcome it. Ha!
The myriad creatures in the world are born from
Something, and Something from Nothing.
Something easily correlates with God. As a child I always wondered where God came from. Something from Nothing answers this elegantly. However, the profound significance of nothing and weakness are probably the best kept (yet utterly obvious) secrets around. We are so instinctually driven toward ‘things’ and ‘control’.
Out of Nothing came the Something of the Big Bang.